Similarly to my queer background, being working class is this denominator that simultaneously feels too important to deny and petty to mention.
She talked about the different languages of the academic world and how that creates a barrier of entry. It excludes and includes specific types od people - educated, financiall stable or safe and in some ways there is similarities to a straight language.
I was chatting to this art community in lower austria asking them if they had connections to queer people on the countryside and while they did not know anyone personally who hasn’t moved away, there was this unanimous understanding of the topic being a blind spot in the area. And also the fact that every queer person she knew having relocated in a city speaks on the whole subject quite deeply.
Queer people literally flee the space one could say. It’s an act of resistance to stay and one of reconciliation to re-engage. Navigating this fragile relationship I have as a queer person seems to be - methodologically and practically - a central point of the project.
How I work reflects my positionality, my options, my orientations towards others within this space. Bread as an abstracting medium grants me the distance necessary to talk about queer issues in and around my home.
I feel a need to go home and bake this breadman. Lifesize.
And maybe a house.
How to make it all make sense from Sara Ahmed to Didier Eribon to my own Experience and queer expression as in Queer Art a Freak Theory by Renate Lorenz and Queer Theatre by Stefan Brecht?
How does my bread fit in there, my digital spaces and tryouts, my performance, the fool?
04/12/2025
The breadman is the exteriorised self. The search for identity that tragically falls flat to create a presumably dead entity.
The fool thinks the breadman needs to be rescued - in an attempt at saving themselves.
The Moonface knows a lot, holds wisdom. is a silent by-sitter. Observes. Has realised talking is of no use.
The marionette is a childlike version of protagonist, animated only in the dream world, outside of it the fool is tragically unable to operate it. The digital dream world is what constitues the inner world of the fool. Murky memories and glorious simplicity.
The Carp has layers, it is what is feasted on, a digestable version of home to be reconsidered. It talks in common wisdom.
They peel away layers to the carp, finding only butterflies.
They make a puppet in their image to project their worries and upcoming fears onto.
They get angry and drag it to the forest to talk.
The spirit moonface shows up with the carp and they remind him of the fallability of memory and the redundancy of digging for truth.
Identity is performed in dissonance realms.
The fools dream space harkens back to the past, to a space where identity was not yet formed, in turn looking for one was not even on the agenda. This time is frozen in place and made magical through imposing long-gone freedom.
The carp comes back to the fool in a dream - condemming the fool for eating him, for sacrificing his life. The fool takes his leftovers and the butterflies to the lake, giving the corpse back to nature.
The fool dances with the puppet in the forest.
The fool idly plays with the marionette.
The fool drags the puppet from the sink.
The fool drags the puppet through the forest.
The fool sets up a dinner table with the puppet.
Sits down confrontationally.
The moonface brings the carp.
The fool peels away at the carp.
Finds only butterflies.
Throws them at puppet.
Throws over table.
Drags puppet back.
Fool goes to sleep.
Fool dreams - marionette self in dream world.
Carp appears - talks.
Epiphany on bread animation. - Peeling away animation to reveal disintegrating butterfly.
Carp says there is no use peeling away at yourself. We perform identity at any given moment. Rejoice in dissonance, embrace your ruins.
Fool awakes.
Takes carp leftovers and throws them in lake.
Fool dances a waltz with the puppet in the forest.